ndslotesse's Diaryland Diary

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Anything But Ordinary

Dear Diary,

I feel so ordinary right now and I don't know why. I don't know why I feel this way because there has nothning that has happened that makes today any different from yesterday to make me feel this way.

Is it enough to love?
Is it enough to breathe?
Somebody rip my heart out
And leave me here to bleed
Is it enough to die?
Somebody save my life
I'd rather be anything
but ordinary please
~Avril Lavigne,
Anything but Ordinary

I find that I have no distinct quality about me that makes me different from anyone else. I'm not sad at this moment, if that is what you are thinking. I am in a normal state of emotions. Do don't think that a 'depressed' emotion is making me type write right at this moment.

To walk within the lines
Would make my life so boring
I want to know that
I have been to the extreme
So knock me off my feet
Come on now give it to me
Anything to make me feel alive
~Avril Lavigne,
Anything but Ordinary

There's something moving about a grown man crying.

Sorry, that was random but I don't know what to say because I think I am just rambling about stupid things once more. I always am and please forgive me.

You know how I hate to be ordinary and I am. Oh God! I can feel this sort of aura of gray that doesn't seperate me from all the other grays. Am I making any sense? Because I'm not even trying to make sense anymore because it is all in vain.

Please, anything but ordinary.

With care,
Mayms

P.S Why can't I stay concentrated? What's with the crying part of this entry? It makes no sense and it has no purpose.

Is Avril Lavigne a poser? A conformist? There are some extreme views on this. I don't know what to believe b/c if I was her, I hope people understand that I'd sing for me and not for anyone else. And that she's just like me. She is someone who is this person who doesn't like to blend in but people think she is poser b/c her thoughts are thought but not spoken.

I'm not making sense again...

Does loving someone and being loved mean I'm special? Make me someone that's different? To everyone else or just to that person? If being depressed and writing makes me special, then so be it, anything for being unique. Anythning.

11:48 p.m. - 2002-12-30

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

previous - next

latest entry

about me

archives

notes

DiaryLand

contact

random entry

A LONG TIME AGO

2002

March

April

May

June

July

August

September

November

December

2003

January