ndslotesse's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Love Dear Diary, ::SIGH:: I am being hyprocritical again. But, for a change I'm in a good mood. At times, I abhor watching romance movies. But, at times I find myself watching them, sighing, and having a silly goofy grin on my face. I can't help it. I can't stand people who are in love. It's just that I get so angry at them. All I do is rave about how much unfair it is, how they aren't in love and making up terrible excuses to make myself feel better. Sometimes whenever I see a scene on t.v I throw the nearest thing to me at the actors and yell obscenely "LIAR! You don't know what your talking about! You aren't in love!"But, in truth, it's all that I want, and I all that I need. I just get so jealous. As I am walking down the street or hallway, whatever, I see these couples that are so deeply enamored with each other, and I stare coldly at my feet and walk on by in a state of hopeless. I wish I could be in love like them. They are so happy, I can't remember the last time I was happy. I'm not sure if I know the meaning of the word. It's the way they move, the way they walk, or talk...they're so happy. I want to be happy. I want to wake up in the morning, and know that someone loves me. I feel so selfish. Geeze, I watched Titanic and Romeo + Juliet today. I was sighing, laughing, and crying all at the same time. What's it like to be in love? I thought I once knew, but now I'm not so sure. Everything's a mess and all I can think about is being in love...and that someone. With care, 10:36 p.m. - 2002-04-13 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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